Emotionally intelligent leaders are better, honorable leaders! Here’s 4 quick steps to better EQ from ‘Leading with Honor’:
1. Recognize your own emotions. You’re in a meeting and Bob says something that you “know” is absolutely wrong. Your first instinct is to publicly call him out and correct his error—but you’ve been down that road in the past. Fortunately, you recognize that you’re irritated and coach yourself to hold back on your response.
2. Manage your emotions. Instead of calling Bob out, you could say something like, “Gee Bob, I had not thought of it like that before. Can you explain the logic of how that would work?” Of course, your tone of voice and body language are very critical because they reveal your true emotions. Once Bob gives his explanation, more than likely you will see that he’s just operating with a different perspective. In any case, you’ve managed your emotions and maintained your decorum.
3. Recognize the emotions of others. On the way back from the conference room, you run into a peer, Jen, who seems a bit down and overwhelmed. You’re depending on her to deliver the data that you need for the next step of your project and the deadline is tomorrow. Your immediate fear is that it’s not going to happen. Now that you’ve been working to raise your EQ, you mentally push back on your fear and consider what your teammate is up against and how her confidence and energy are sagging. It doesn’t take an EQ genius to realize that putting a guilt trip on her is probably not a good idea.
4. Respond appropriately/effectively to the emotions of others. Because you’re not fear-motivated, you focus on encouraging Jen. After all, she does good work and what she needs right now is an emotional boost. So you choose to show her some empathy and encouragement, telling her that you understand things are difficult right now and asking if there are ways that you and your team can help. You close out by reminding her that she is a great teammate, valuable in your company’s culture, and that you have confidence in her.
Having good EQ may sound somewhat soft, but it’s actually very powerful because it’s about being the most effective leaders possible.
Please comment on your tips and experience too – we’d love to hear your perspective – thank you
Also, read the entire article on this topic – “4 Steps to Battling Leadership Emotions with an EQ Plan”