3 Tips to Leadership Balance and Avoiding Selfish Leadership Behaviors

Consider some of these leadership strengths and what happens when they get too strong:    

  • Confident – Self-centered, talk mainly about their agenda, discount others
  • Decisive – Opinionated–sometimes wrong but never in doubt
  • Initiating – Too aggressive to get what they want
  • Outgoing – Need to be the center of attention
  • Accurate – React strongly to constructive feedback
  • Take Charge – Controlling, believing that they are smarter, superior
  • Strategic – Manipulative of others to get what they want
  • Logical and Objective – Insensitive to the feelings and needs of others
  • Visionary – Blame others when something goes wrong

The whole issue of outward ego strength could be put on a visual continuum – at least for purposes of discussion:

Low self-esteem > Passive > Humble — Balanced > Strong ego > Arrogant > Narcissist

Based on past experience, I would expect the following division in the general population –

  • 1/3 lean toward a strong ego even egotistical.
  • 1/3 lean toward a reticent or quiet ego.
  • 1/3 are more balanced.

How can you coach yourself to maximize your strengths and minimize your struggles? Here are three valuable tips:

1. Gain more self-awareness of how others see you. What traits can you do more or less of to be more effective?

2. If you’re humble and reticent –

    • Believe in yourself and the value you bring to the table and assert yourself into situations.
    • Speak up to share your insights and ideas. Challenge issues when you disagree.
    • Stretch and take on high profile challenges that match your natural talents.

3. If you naturally have a strong ego –

    • Solicit input and practice active listening.
    • Set aside your agenda and become more aware of the other person’s feelings and your own feelings in the moment.
    • Consider how you can affirm, encourage, and support others.

We all have the opportunity and responsibility to lead others in becoming a more balanced leader. Please also add your comments and experience by posting below –

Also, read the entire article on this topic – “9 Behaviors of a Narcissistic Leader”  


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